Wednesday, March 28, 2012


Today the unthinkable happened: I LOST GRANT’S LOVEY!

If you’re not a parent and you don’t know what that means it’s basically a child’s special stuffed animal/blanket/toy.  The one they “love” the most.  Hence: Lovey.

Grant’s is a stuffed dog head with a blanket body.  It’s like a stuffed animal knocked up a blanket and this was the product of their union.  Whoever came up with that idea is currently a multi-millionaire. 

Carter’s lovey is a Tigger.  So we call him…Tigger.  We had no idea what to name blanket-dog-head so we call him Grant’s “Guy”.  He now has a Brown Guy and a White Guy.  I know.  But let’s not address the weird racial implications now, k?

Usually I don’t allow the kids to take their lovies out of the house.  God Forbid they lose it.  It would be easier to replace an arm than it would be to replace one of those damn things.  I keep a better eye on the lovies than I do on the children:
“Where’s Grant?”
“I don’t know…but his Guy is right here so if we ever do find him we’re all set…”

Today I was running super late picking up Carter so when Grant clutched Guy and refused to leave the house without him I gave in.  Whatever.  Take whatever will make you stop screaming long enough for me to strap your contorted little body into your seat.  Let’s go.
After school I took the boys out for lunch.  On our way home I realized Guy was among the missing.  I almost crashed the car.  No, really.  I started frantically looking around for him and I literally almost crashed the car.  People were beeping at me as I sat at a green light and threw around the contents of my purse and Carter's backpack. Where the hell is Guy?

I started thinking of what life might be like without Guy.  Will Grant be forced to forever roam the earth, alone and unable to sleep without his blanket dog head thingy?  Will the mourning process be quick or will we have to listen to him silently weep for his lost friend for months?  This is awful.

I thought about just running to the store and buying another one.  But I’m pretty sure I’d have to spend two years biting the nose and stroking the ears before it even came close to resembling the original.  I don’t have that kind of time…or dedication. 

Lucky for us we found Guy sitting on a shelf at Carter’s school where I had put him while getting coats on the kids.  When I saw him sitting there I let out a cry equivalent to that of someone who had just been reunited with a long lost relative who they hadn't seen in 20 years. 

Praise the Lord!  Guy has come home! 
I’m going to invent some sort of Lovey GPS system.  If you’re laughing at that idea you are clearly not a parent who has experienced this particular tragedy.  It would sell.


  1. As I tweeted last night, this scenario is my nightmare! My daughter picked the one lovey we don't have a replacement for. I don't know what we'd do if we lost it! Her lovey has an equally sad name as "Guy." I gave all her animals creative names (Carl Caterpillar, Beatrice Bunny, etc.), but got lazy when I got to the ump-teenth pink bear. So she got dubbed "Pinky." Sad, but true.

  2. P.S. If you do ever lose brown Guy, I have one you could have! C never took to it. Of course, like you said, you'd need to bite and stroke him to perfection :)

  3. Pinky and Guy should go on a date sometime...

    They do sell Guys in the stores still. Maybe I should get one now and start abusing it in case we ever need one for the future!

  4. I understand your struggles...we can lose binkies, that's fine, we'll buy new ones - but if we loose bearbears, the twins would never let us sleep again, and that would be horrible! We have been searching for nearly a year trying to find something even close to what they have, and so far our search has turned up nothing.

  5. incidentally - the photos of your son's lovey loaded after I posted - their bears are very similar to his Guy - do you recall where you got yours? Is there somewhere I can order them online?


      I truely hope that helps you because it's a nightmare!!